cigarette death.

Echos in Hymnh
Lingering, lifeless, & dim
Caroled curses
Over a great divide
& it flows so softly;
Crashing on the embankment
Ghastly, garish, gore
Some preemptive presumption
Guiding a false redemption
On the steps of your war monument
Your battle paint smears
On a lucid sobbing face
Beg for rescue
Beg for escape
From this paradise
Based in fiction
Founded on false tradition
Another smoldering tip
Hinged on your blood lip
Exhaling for a future
Inhale for another

Glow to dust.

Glow:
I see myself.
Reflecting in the portraits
Of family members
And I'm looking down
Gunshot.
Bleeding out.
On the stairwell
Watching it pool
& going to school.
(Catching the bus)
(First day)
(So nervous)
Thinking:
Never growing up!
In my last breath
Stuck in my chest
Never coming out!
I can make it if I try.
Never gonna die!
Just always the same.
Just a stain.
Dust:

Brooder.

Blood orange cathedral
Glowing; gleaming, bleeding
On this descent into dusk
Phosperent; it's penetrating:

I so blindly wander
Through your stained-glassed doors
To your shrine of passing ego
Like songs of courage & arms
They fall as they reach crescendo
(And what to do if I should)
I drop to my knees
(With their shrieks and screams)
Bite my tounge with reckless anger
Paint my face in the rust of armor
& rise up like a tragic hero
Journey out into the desert
I'll exploit my own adventure
In photographs
& literature
I'll be the burden:
Of my own honor.

Until I realize.

Audio cassette
Playing monotone
Muted rain fall
Causing:
Static shots out the window
The blinds half blinking
(See the cold light swimming)
On so many faces
Stoic yet uncertain
Gasping from the last encounter
Of a muffled conversation
Where they don't remember:
What was said:
"Or what was told"
-Unclear-
To be so bold:
What to think
...or feel....
To run
Or stand still
Now they're in a quiet panic
(Seated at the table)
Coiled by their secrets
And haunted by their lies
Wonder what will live
& what will die?
What will matter if I stay alive?
& I can't hold my breath.
To break this silence.
And like a shot in the dark:
I hear myself explode.

The emotions that we felt at the carnival late at night.

Blanket Dream
I see your reflection
Words sounding backwords
Discussing the art of being mysterious
Saw your bones drift out like smoke
The oil of the pupils;
Leaving their shells
In puddles of thoughts
And in the lights
It looks like irony
But I know you better
Than you tried not to...
...know yourself
No need to escape exposure
You're no vacant host
To this all impending
Aura of delusion
Threatening to define
You as a feature
More than the:
Hand
Nails
Teeth
...the blood.

CHEEP CREEP.

Oh, how warranted appraise
Delivers conscience traveling
In mounting fists of crooked
Thoughts
Which I raise to the sky
Only to punish and pummel
That which is so forgiving
Moving, drifting, warming
Fleeing
...And falling
To my feet
As I cower
In my own bloodied hands
Terrified at the thought
Of the love in my mind

Real.

I wanna live really fast
And never stop
That's the difference between:
Burning down a house
& blowing up the place
To be engulfed in flames...
As I run out
Into one last summer sunset
& fall into the lake
Like a faling star
..I'd be my own idol.

Understanding.

To trust
In a cavern
Now confused by the creation
Of this tremulous thought
So secret...
So...true
Just an honest secret
What am I to do?
& I'm worried my hands...
...aren't there...
When I hold them beyond the wall
Trying to reach out
& thank somebody.
For:
the
"love:
(So obtuse)

Assemble, light.

Stood in the shapes and lines
What separates...
...space and time
Lands cracked like dry-earth
Came an array of colors
Sprouting from dirt

Here; appear:
Milk thistle
With leaves and thorns
Flowers of bristle
Cloud out the clot
Of a rainstorm
Thunder, shame, doubt
& carry your own hands
To last fade of winding sun
Red heir & desperate sands

To all bright...
Confusion
To be in light
Transfusion
Of souls & eyes
& Ascension
Of pains & dyes
See other dimension:

The mechanics of it all...
Don't seem to add up
Like I'll pretend to fall...
Yet manage somehow to jump

Before I hit the ground
Or even make a sound

With one foul swoop...
Or one last thrust...
See the workings of this dusk.

My Death Stance

In the lone marsh
Heard words
Only Whispering
Through the mist
Carving a shadow
Most simple
In it's depiction
Of reality-
Based human
Colleting the
Petals...
Of many
Dying
Flowers
Said:
"Hold your breath"
As we fall to ash
Cradled like cravens
In our
Last
Moments
of
Desperation:

Covering our eyes
Hands on our heads
No shelter
No shadow
Just mist
Just missed
& now we die.

False Distinction.

White flower on the wrist
Pale on a landscape of ebony
Wavers down the arm
When the ink spills
Like blood from the thorns
(Marching down the path)
Carried on the litter
Curtained up
On a vagous path
Our only light
A hand-made twilight
Cut out by perverts
& deviants
Watching us:
Cullied
By chance of redemption:
"Onward to the throne!"
One last dance
One last party
Until we meet our ends
At the altar
Before our replacements
New yet remembered
Memories
Not distinguished
Corrupting ever breath
Before we kiss
& feel the knife
We talked of emerald fields
We talked of ghosts on the marsh
We never saw
We never thought.

Celestial Season Being

Fall girls
Not like summer girls
Can't see their faces
Bright lights
Confusing
Truth
Beyond their curtains
Stitched at the sleeves
These wing-readied-beings

I
Must try to hide

Down in the valley
Escape their sights
& their talons
Try to know
A feeling
That's what
One was
Now forming
I can't explain it
Just shaking
In place
Unassuming

To the disguise
Mouths instead
Of
Eyes

And here I thought love
Was in my heart
Not my
Mind

Plucked out
& passed out
Like a child's toy

There's nothing
There's not here
Just my...
Blood
My blood!
Oh my!

Got to try
Got to try
To find
The truth!

Our grief only halted by the promise of promiscuity.

Wandered away from those missionaries
Bibles at their belts
Crosses noose-d around their necks
I pulled down my death mask
To face my fears
Face what's next
A tender touch in the baron winter
Full in hollow
Fat and narrow
Calloused yet forgiving
She stood up for herself
In my shadow
Cast about the trees and the marsh
Danced in mutual haze
Our hands like specks of light
Reflecting off the darkness
Shattered mirrors
Balanced our bodies
On a tight rope
To the fire
Called her my Joan of Arc
And with a whimper and a bruise
Knew the night was gone
Innocence in the dusk
Overwhelming
Caught up in ancient trial
Sand worn walls
I smell decay
Look in the well
See ourselves
Painted; cracked faces
Alabaster porcelin
Wash in those filthy waters
Wash away the skin
Tears taste like envy
Realize our shapes
Now that we're reliving
Fingers down a chest
A locket by the heart
Locked in the secret
& off we darted
Our seperate ways.